


🥨 = 🤤

by katychan666



Series: Texting Series [19]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Crack, M/M, Pretzels, Texting, emojis
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-29
Updated: 2019-04-29
Packaged: 2020-02-09 17:48:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,423
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18643030
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/katychan666/pseuds/katychan666
Summary: Asmodeus throws a pretzel party and wants Alec and Magnus to attend it 😈😈





	🥨 = 🤤

Alec was in his office, minding his own business when someone decided to disturb his peace by texting him again and he sighed when he saw his father's in law name written on the screen. Ah, yes. It appeared that Asmodeus was in his clingy mode again and he couldn’t help but to smile. For the King of Edom, he was pretty… hmm… well, special. Then again, so were the others of Magnus’ family; he had met them and he had to agree that the special gene was passing down from generation to generation. Alec was trying to get some done actually that day, but it seemed that it wasn’t going to happen as his phone kept buzzing and buzzing and Alec massaged his temples.

 

**Asmodeus: 🥨👀** _? _

**Asmodeus: 🧐🧐🧐🧐**

**Alec:** _???? _

**Asmodeus: 🥨🥨🥨** _!!!! _

**Asmodeus: 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺**

**Alec:** _ What is going on? What about pretzels?! I don't get it, explain it to me properly  _ 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭. 

**Alec:** _ Pretty please?  _ 😱

**Asmodeus: 😈😈😈😈😈😈😈**

**Asmodeus:** _ I have  _ 🥨 ✨.  _ And I was wondering if you would like some. I tried one the other day (did you know there's a thing like national pretzel day?!!) anyway! So I tried them and my world has been changed. Now I wanna share them with people I love, because pretzels are meant to be shared  _ 😏😎✨😈😈

**Alec:** _ Ah ~ _

**Asmodeus:** _ Yes  _ 😈😈🔥

**Asmodeus:** _ So how about it?  _ 🍻😉

**Alec:** _ Well I'm kind of in a middle of something... _

**Asmodeus: 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭**

**Asmodeus: 😿😿😿😿😿😿😿😿😿**

**Asmodeus: 💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔**

**Asmodeus:** _ I was slaving off in the kitchen for hours. I baked for hours and it was my first time baking.  _ 🥺 _ But it's okay, I totally understand. I'll just eat them alone  _ 💔.  _ I get it. It's just me and the pretzels. They're my friends. They would never abandon me. I'll be fine. It's okay  _ 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

 

Alec exhaled deeply. Well. Fuck. He didn't Asmodeus made them  _ himself.  _ If he did, he wouldn't flat out reject him like that and Alec huffed under his breath. Alec didn’t know what to do; Magnus would tell him to flat out ignore his father, but Alec couldn’t do this, especially not know that Alec was spamming his texts with crying emojis and broken hearts. Alec took in a deep breath and knew that he was probably going to regret his life choices, but well… fuck it. 

 

**Alec:** _ So, um…. when can I come over? _

**Asmodeus:** _!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! _

**Asmodeus:** _ Oh, are you for real?  _ **🧐** _ Would you really come over and chill with me for a while? This could be lots of fun, actually  _ 😎✨😈

**Alec:** _ Oh, yes… it would be my pleasure _

**Asmodeus: 💝💝💝💝💝💝💝💝💝💝💝💝💝💝💝💝💝**

 

Alec was grinning as he was replying back to Asmodeus. All in all, he enjoyed spending time with his father in law, he was pretty cool… especially for a demon. And how many people could say that their father in law was a Greater Demo  _ and _ the King of Edom. Not many, right? So Alec was feeling quite content with himself as he and Asmodeus were planning the time of when the meeting was about to happen.

 

As Alec was at the Institute, Magnus was happily sipping drinks with Catarina at his place and had a little smile on his face as he watched little Madzie running around the place .She was adorable and he just fondly winked at her as  the little warlock looked at him and then went back to chasing Chairman Meow around the place. Even though Chairman didn’t look like he was having fun when the girl was over, he was actually happier than ever to finally have someone that chased him around the place, made him hide under things and then ‘attack’. The two were adorable and Magnus just couldn’t wait until he and Alexander were going to adopt a child of their very own. He could just see that Alexander was going to be an amazing parent, the smile up to his ears as he imagined Alec with a baby in his lap and he was just…

 

“What’s on your mind, Magnus?” asked Catarina when she noticed the huge smile on Magnus’ lips and he only shrugged it off, shaking his head and then he cleared his throat.

 

“Not much,” said Magnus, but kept himself entertained for a little while, until he felt his phone buzzing and his train of thoughts was interrupted. He narrowed his eyes when he saw that his father was texting him…  _ again.  _ Why? When he could easily portal himself in there and- Never mind, Magnus quite quickly realised that it was for the best if their interactions happened in the texts, especially with Madzie over. With a sigh, Magnus opened up his texts and just… was horrified when he saw the swarm of texts from his beloved father.

 

**Asmodeus: 🥨🥨🥨🥨🥨🥨🥨🥨🥨🥨🥨** _!!!!!!!!!! _

**Magnus:** _????????????? _

**Asmodeus:** _ Oh, don’t act coy! You and me both know that they’ve always been your favourite kind of a snack!  _ 😍😍😍😍

**Asmodeus:** _ So being the kind father that I am, I decided to take it upon me and I made some! I also didn’t forget to make the potato salad, you favourite, my son. _

**Asmodeus:** _ I cut it into tiny pieces for your tiny little mouth, just like when you were little!  _ 😍😍😍😍😍😍

**Asmodeus:** _ Oh, should I also make BBQ?! I know how much you love it, so perhaps- _

**Magnus:** _ DON.’T  _ 🤦‍🤦‍🤦‍🤦‍🤦‍

**Asmodeus:** _?????? _

**Asmodeus:** _ What do you mean? Do you not like it anymore?  _ **😭😭😭😭😭😭**

**Asmodeus:** _ Okay fine, how about only  _ **🥨** _???? _

**Magnus:** _ Why the fuck are you so hung up on those pretzels, omg! _

**Asmodeus:** _ Because everything is about  _ **🥨**

**Magnus: 😒😒😒😒😒😒😒😒😒**

**Magnus:** _ Also what is that supposed to mean? _

**Asmodeus: 🥨 = 🤤**

**Magnus:** 🤦‍🤦‍🤦‍🤦‍🤦‍🤦‍🤦‍🤦‍🤦‍🤦‍🤦‍🤦‍🤦‍🤦‍🤦‍🤦‍🤦‍🤦‍🤦‍🤦‍🤦‍🤦‍🤦‍🤦‍🤦‍🤦‍🤦‍🤦‍🤦‍🤦‍🤦‍🤦‍🤦‍🤦‍

**Magnus:** _ My father is ... _

**Asmodeus:** _ Watch what you say, boy, or I’ll be washing that mouth with soap, is that understood?  _ 😈😈😈😈😈😈

**Magnus: 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄**

**Asmodeus:** _ You dare to roll your eyes at you own father?  _ 😱😱😱😱

**Asmodeus:** _ The horror. The disrespect.  _ 😱😱  _ That’s it, you’re GROUNDED. No matter how much that pains me to hear it, but for the next 100 years you’re grounded, young man.  _ 😈😈😈😈😈

 

Magnus chuckled and he then just rolled his eyes. 

 

**Magnus: 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺**

**Asmodeus:** _ Nope, not gonna work this done. You’re in a big trouble! _

**Magnus: 😢 😢 😢 😢 😢 😢 😢😢**

**Asmodeus: 😶😶😶😶😶😶😶**

**Magnus: 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭**

**Asmodeus: 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭**

**Asmodeus:** _ I apologise my son. _

**Asmodeus:** _ I’m undoing my punishment. You’re UNgrounded  _ 😭😭😭😭😭

**Magnus: 😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎**

**Asmodeus:** _ YOU TRICKED ME  _ 😱😱😱😱😱😱

**Magnus: 😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎**

**Asmodeus:** _ You hurt my feelings and if you want me to ever forgive you, you must come over and have  _ **🥨** _ with me and Alec! _

 

Wait, what?! Alexander was coming over for the pretzels as well? What the hell was going on?! Magnus straightened himself up and noticed that Catarina was laughing at him as she was spying on his conversation with his father and Magnus grumbled under his breath. “My husband is a traitor,” said Magnus and then pouted.

 

“Your father is adorable, Magnus,” said Catarina and Magnus gave her a horrified look, shaking his head. “What? You always say that he’s this big, old, evil demon, when it reality he’s just a sweetheart. I mean I know, I’ve met him before. He’s quite charming in person even more so,” she then continued and Magnus narrowed his eyes. Why… was Catarina…?!

 

“No, don’t even-”

 

“Oh, please, it’s not like that,” said Catarina and rolled her eyes. “I’m just saying you should go to that dinner… or whatever he’s making. Pretzel party?” she asked Magnus rolled his eyes. “It could be fun,” said Catarina and shrugged. 

 

Magnus decided to ask his husband what the hell was going on.

 

**Magnus:** _ Alexander, you have exactly 30 seconds to explain yourself. Why is my father telling me that you’re coming over to his pretzel party?! _

**Alec:** _ Oh, pretzel party! Wait, I’ll tell him. He’s right here, he’ll love the idea. Thank you, love  _ 😋😋😋😋

**Magnus:** _ Wait, wait, you’re already THERE?! _

**Alec:** _ Yessss  _ 😅😅😅😅

**Magnus:** _ TRAITOR!  _ 😡😡😡😡😡😡

**Alec: 🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗**

**Alec:** _ It’s so much fun. Woo-hoo! _

**Alec:** _ Oh, is it true that he had to cut potato really tiny when you were little?  _ 🤣🤣🤣  _ That’s so adorable!  _ 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍

**Magnus:** 😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑

 

**“** I think it’s best if you go there and stop your dad, **”** commented Catarina and Magnus realised that she was right. If not, his dad was going to tell Alexander  _ everything _ and Magnus shuddered. 

 

**Magnus:** _ Dad, please stop sharing embarrassing stories from my childhood. Fine I’m going to come just stop… okay?! _

**Asmodeus: 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍**

**Asmodeus: 😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈**

**Asmodeus:** _ Pretzel party is on, baby!  _ ✨✨✨✨✨

**Magnus:** _ How great… _

 

Magnus portalled them himself over to his dad’s place and sighed when he saw Alec and Asmodeus, but then smiled and happily went over to his husband, sitting in between Alec and his dad, because he wanted them to be apart. He didn’t want Asmodeus telling Alec more embarrassing stuff about his childhood to Alexander, although the damage was already done.

 

But those pretzels were to die for. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading  
> Leave a comment if you liked it 😏😏😏🎉


End file.
